10 PRINT “I WILL KILL YOU”

Goddamn right I will.

You think standing hip deep in someone’s guts with wearing their face for camo is tragic. That is motherfucking Thursday for met, bitch.

Steal my shit one more time, you goddamn crackheads. You know what you got waiting for you? .338 Weatherby, asshole. It doesn’t have to be silent when I’m a mile away. Yeah, I saw your meth mouth face walking away with my bike wheel. Well, you have misjudged this biker.

I don’t wear spandex. I don’t drink PowerGel. I don’t carbo-load or shave my arms. I am a big, scary, murdering motherfucker. And you stole my shit.

If I see your cheap Wal-Mart Mongoose running my Mavic X rim on stainless spokes spinning on that XTR hub with the brake disc I made my GODDAMN SELF, then you will meet my two best friends. The one on the left with the grinder burns and the broken pinky is Thunder, the one on the right with the knife scars is Lightning. You will be aquainted.

That’s right.

20 GOTO 10, motherfucker.

Snap, Crackle, Pop. You are not ready for the fate that awaits you.

RUN, bitch. RUN.

6 Responses to “10 PRINT “I WILL KILL YOU””

  1. Dexter Colt Says:

    Few things worse than a thieving motherfucker. Rapist & child molesters then thieves. I hope you get the retribution you seek.

  2. Hmm. The program loop adds a kind of persuasive logic to the anger. I would be afraid.

  3. DC: I sort of don’t. I’d hate to do 20 to life over a wheel. Even if it was an awesome wheel.

    Anaglyph: That’s BASICally what I was shooting for…

    Done. And done. Just waiting on a target.

  4. I wouldn’t want to get on your wrong side Casey…..

  5. Then you better not steal my wheel…

    Unless you’re naked.

    Then it’s not stealing.

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